Emotions · 5 min

Talking about emotions with young kids.

Naming what you feel is the first step to regulating emotions. See why it works, the most common mistake, and 5 simple paths to start today — no magic formulas.

💛
Feeling is ok
what you do is what you teach
Why it works

Naming the feeling calms the brain.

When a child hears "you're angry because your brother took your toy", the rational part of the brain starts working alongside the emotional one. The intensity drops — and, over time, the child learns to do this on their own.

⚠️

The most common mistake

Trying to fix before welcoming. Lines like "it's not a big deal" or "stop crying" close the door. Start with "I see that…" — then talk about what to do.

5 paths

Small gestures, big bridges.

Ready to try today at home.

1
🏷️

Name what's happening

Put a name to what you see: 'it looks like you're frustrated because the tower fell'. The word organizes the internal chaos.

2
🤗

Validate before correcting

Welcome first, teach later. 'It really is hard' is worth more than 'it's not a big deal'.

3
📖

Use books and characters

Stories create safe distance to talk about fear, anger, jealousy and longing — without the child having to expose themselves.

4
🎨

Build an emotional vocabulary

Go beyond happy/sad. Introduce words like relieved, embarrassed, anxious, disappointed, proud.

5
🪞

Model your own feelings

Say out loud: 'I'm tired and that's why I need a minute'. Kids learn by watching, not by lectures.

Emotional vocabulary

12 words to introduce little by little.

Put them on the mirror, fridge or next to the toothbrush. Ask: "which one matches you right now?".

😀
Happy
😢
Sad
😡
Angry
😨
Scared
😳
Embarrassed
😮
Surprised
😌
Relieved
🥹
Moved
😔
Disappointed
🤩
Excited
😟
Anxious
🥱
Tired
What to say

Change one line, change the conversation.

Instead of

"Stop crying, it's nothing."

Try

"I see you got sad. Want a hug?"

Instead of

"You're bad!"

Try

"That behavior hurt someone. Let's think together."

Instead of

"There's no reason to be angry."

Try

"You have the right to feel angry. Hitting is not ok — talking is."

Instead of

"It's over, just forget it."

Try

"That really was scary. I'm right here with you."

Veja também

Keep exploring

More tools for the family's emotional everyday.

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